By the Meekness and gentleness of Christ, I appeal to you (2 Cor 10:1) that gentleness indeed holds such a great power and those who possess that fruit of the Spirit knows exactly what I mean! Here I go AGAIN with this gentleness topic.... I do not know I how got here again, but I am assuming that it needs to be heard.
I am reading many different books for Christian women and two of them are Kingdom Woman by Tony Evans and his daughter, Chrystal Evans Hurst and I keep going back to the book Captivating by John and Stasi Eldredge. Go pick up these amazing books!
Well I was rereading the chapter in Captivating titled, "Arousing Adam" and it was so deep and I just kept hearing gentleness. For the past couple of months I have been struggling with being heard and felt like I was being taken advantage of by so many people and I thought that is was because I was so kind and gentle and so I began to try to be a bit more TOUGH and have an attitude. I began to see people's Diva-like, "Aint nobody got time for that" type attitudes and thought it was working well. I tried it and failed. I felt silly, I felt like it just did not come out as nice as I thought it would. I just wanted to be heard you know. But that was not me.
One day I was with one of my more "Urban" Girl Scout groups, a bunch of 4/5th graders and I spoke to them nicely, did not raise my voice and just was kind to them something they were not used to. But they were being so loud and doing their own thing and I began to get more stern. But then a hall monitor came in loud and putting them in "check" and they got quiet but out of fear. I asked them, "Is that how I need for you all to listen? Be loud and mean or speak to you nicely?" They said, "No, NICELY" I then realized they loved being with me because I was calm and sweet and gentle something they needed but was not used to. So I began to love on them a little bit more when they wanted hugs I gave them hugs, when they wanted to talk I let them talk and I listened.
Now ladies, we have become a loud, angry, violent type of women and it has come from so many issues that we have been through and our parents have been through that we keep trying to adapt to this crazy world. Thing about it we are to live in the world not be of it (John 15:19) that is where we are struggling because we want the world to love us because we love it. 1 John 2:15-17 says, If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride in possessions—is not from the Father but is from the world. And the world is passing away along with its desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever.
Why can't we be a gentle woman speaking with kindness, showing love and mercy? I will let you know that the most loud, angry women heavily portrayed in the media is of black women, I see it on videos and even in real life. I am not trying to single any race out that is what I see and what the world sees and people laugh. It is so sad to me. I live in Minnesota, born and raised and seen really old married black couples and very few YOUNG married. Why is that? I went to college in Marshall, MN and saw so many young married white couples and serious relationships. I saw the black football players as just that, "PLAYERS" but they weren't with the black girls, they were with the white girls. A few black guys said they don't like all that loud attitude black girls give and I was like dang.... But oh well. Just earlier I was watching a couple videos people posted on FB of black girls LOUD AND FIGHTING... and the guys just sat around laughing.
I remember one thing my husband said while we were dating and even in marriage he needed peace in the home. Peace not meaning quiet but peace as in serene a place of retreat, a place to be revived and rejuvenated. A place where he WANTED to come home, a place to escape the madness of the world. And why shouldn't he be allowed that? I know I want it! Did you read that story at the top? How the sun won with gentleness? I am telling you, you could get a lot of what you want with being gentle.
If you are seeking to get married or need a more peaceful place at home in the marriage you have, just remember that men, the real ones, the ones that want to make YOU THE ONE, want and need a wife to be gentle. Gentle with her words and actions. Here are some scriptures to prove it:
So if we see that being contentious, petulant, cross, quarreling etc. has the power to drive away our men then what power do we have with showing and being gentle?
So it can break bones, turn away wrath, is forever beautiful, and like Christ... hmmm there seems to be a lot of power.
If we are Christians that means we are to being walking like Christ, Christ said, Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. (Matt 11:29)
Be like Christ, be gentle to those around you, they need the peace, they need rest for their souls. Our men had a long, tough day at work be gentle. Our children was bullied or yelled at, be gentle. Your friends and family are going through a tough time, be gentle... Be gentle to all (2 Tim 2:24).
I dare you to practice this, you will change your atmosphere for better!
Peace and Blessings,